I keep reminding myself it's just a season and trying to give myself grace, but I would be lying if I said life were easy right now. {for anyone that missed it, Adam has been in Florida since the beginning of March and will stay there most of the time until the kids and I join him this summer}. Most days, I feel good keeping everyone going on the Iowa side, but today was the second day since Adam's been gone that felt exceptionally hard. I know so many others have far more challenging lives than me, so I try not to complain. That being said, I don't like to ask for help, but life is full right now and it often just feels hard. On the tough days I just keep cycling all the blessings through my mind -- the kids are helpful, they're pretty independent/easy, I'm only 'single momming' it for a season, etc. But sometimes that isn't enough to keep me feeling so overwhelmed. I feel like I have a million things running through my mind at all times. I know it's a bunch of first world problems, and my only real 'job' is to keep my kids fed, clothed, get my work done, etc. We had an awesome sermon last Sunday on growing with God in the desert. It was just what I needed to hear. I'm walking in the desert right now, but it won't last forever.
For the curious...a little glimpse at a few of the extras I did today besides keep the kids alive and work -- call the home insurance company, call the mortgage company, email insurance company, fill out paperwork for insurance company, talk to contractor, start looking for someone to do the kitchen, order backsplash for kitchen, work at the concession stand/watch Jordyn's softball game, prep dinner, fold laundry, start laundry, start dishes, send thank you to a customer, chat with a friend, Marco Polo friend group about a trip, call the credit card company to reverse a charge, drop a return to FedEx, start a return for Jordyn's sandals, order softball pants and a belt for Jordyn, search for football gloves for Cullyn, made a dinner plan for the week, run to the grocery store, drop stuff at the post office, Facetime Adam, make dinner & eat in the car, watch an episode of Home Improvement with the kids, remind Jordyn to practice piano, remind the kids to feed pets, order a gift for the piano teacher, email CPA about taxes, and now rant about all of it to you.
I know nobody is asking, but my Mother's Day wish is for a massage and a nap. Until then I'm going to let myself have a good cry in the shower tonight and start over tomorrow. I know by Sunday night a lot of the stuff on this list will be done and I'll feel better, but man I'm tired tonight. Getting a house sell ready, during baseball/softball season, while being a solo parent to two kids and working a full time job plus a side hustle is no small feat. Night friends!
