I will blog again...

someday!  Until then I'll just use this space to complain about everything…work, weight, friends, money, holidays….

While everyone else is busy seeing taking their kids to see Santa, hanging holiday decor, hosting holiday parties, buying thoughtful, elaborate gifts, and making magical memories...I'll be sitting behind my computer being grumpy and eating my kids Advent chocolates.  The truth is, I have zero motivation for anything right now.  Adam and his dad hung the lights outside at the lake, I threw a little bit of Christmas decor up this weekend, and I've done a decent amount of shopping {from my computer, of course} but other than that…NOTHING!  I just don't 'feel it' this year.  I'm not happy and excited.  I'm broke and exhausted.  I can't even muster the strength to give either of our parents Christmas ideas for me.  It's just that I am so unhappy with how I look that I don't even want to leave my house let alone go and try things on at the store.  Plus everything is so darn expensive that it's hard to justify anything.

If you want my real Christmas list, this would be it…

a weekend in a cozy hotel, out of town, where they would color my hair, massage my body, and bring my room service.  And I could sleep the 'bags under my eyes' away.

or

a weekend by myself at home, where I could sit and finish all of the photo books & blog posts that I've started over the past year.  Where I could actually clean my entire house, like ceiling fans and sheets.  And I could sleep until my heart desired.

I would like all of this without the guilt of being a selfish mom {impossible!} and without feeling like my kids were inconveniencing anyone.