Saturday, May 9, 2015

An Emotional Wreck!

This is one of those venting posts that's basically annoying to everyone else, so I'm going to stuff it back to Saturday.  But basically, long story short, my head is spinning right now!

I have so many thoughts spiraling my head right now.  Mother's day was yesterday and we didn't celebrate as a family this year, despite all being in the same town for a while, complements of a family feud which I'm not even going to go into details about on here.  Plus I had to send my kids with my parents for the week, again, since we terminated our contract with our nanny and are between sitters, again.  I feel like my kids have stayed with my parents half of this year so far.  I'm so incredibly thankful for my mom who is willing and able 'save us' during times like this.  It really does take a village to raise a child & this year has shown us that time and time again.  But I can't help but feel judged by other's for the amount of days I haven't actually parented my children this year.  Which is just crazy since I would prefer to have them at home.  There was a point in time when I actually welcomed my kids staying with grandparents {probably 6 months when we were so sleep deprived}, but honestly they're pretty easy now.  And other than being busy with an adult event which they can't go to, I would rather keep them with me all of the time.  I know I shouldn't let rude comments from other people {especially childless, because karma is a motha!}, but it still hurts.  No matter how clueless the person saying it is.  On top of it, today is my oldest niece's last day of high school.  Her graduation and party are on Saturday.  And although I know we will continue to see her often, I just can't seem to keep the tears away.  Plus it's just another reminder how fast life goes and how precious our time with our children is.  Also, one of my students wrote me the sweetest card on his last day of med school. Beyond all of this, I'm stressed because our schedule is just nuts right now.  I've cut back on photography {to keep my sanity}, but we've still had to reschedule our family photos for the THIRD time now {which I feel so terrible about!} since they kids are gone this week.  And I'm having a hard time squeezing in time for our niece's trap shooting & track, our other niece's track meet, & another nieces baseball game.  I hate missing these things {I honestly enjoy them!}and can't helped but feel judged that we miss them. I know they say they understand, and I know deep down they do, but I also know what it's like when people don't make time for your kids' events.  Add in cleaning, grocery shopping, meal planning, etc. and I'm just spinning!  My lunch break is over, so I guess I'll cut myself off for now.  Basically, please bare with me for a bit...


  1. I'm so sorry. Life sounds hectic. Child care is such an issue, I wish I could help. Hang in there mama, you are doing great!!!

  2. Oh no! I hope you get the child care figured out soon!! Move here and I will watch them haha. I must have missed something about firing the nanny! This time will pass, just a bump in the road!!

    1. I wish we lived close enough for you to watch're so amazing with Noah! Thank you for the sweet words!


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