Monday, June 3, 2013

Maternity Leave | The 2nd Time

[As you read this I'll be in the middle of my first day back to work, so please say a little prayer that I'm making it through the day!]

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I'm sitting in bed with a glass of wine unsure how to even start this post.  My maternity leave with Jordyn was just so, so miserable {if you're new or don't remember, I spent most of my maternity leave with a VERY sick dog, and when I wasn't in Ames with him, I was taking Jordyn to her appointments--Well Checks, Adam to his--esophagus x2, or going to my own--recheck} that I didn't have many expectations for this one.  Maybe that's part of why it was so amazing.  Perfect in every way {except the not sleeping part...that is still far from perfect!} :)

I've taken far less photos this time around {unless you count Instagram of course!}, but I like to tell myself that's because I've been so much more present this time around.  I'm not taking anything for granted; all the little details of a newborn... the snorting noises, the twitches before he falls asleep, even the way his cries go from zero to ten in a millisecond.  I want to remember every thing.  This time around...I'm not feeling guilty for sitting and snuggling him ever chance I get.  I know now this is all gone in a flash.  Before you know it they're yelling 'NO!' at everything you say.  Most of all, I know that if my husband gets his way, this will be our last {Note: It is still very much under discussion!  If I get my way we will have two more little rugrats running around in about five years}.  Just the thought that Baby Cullyn could be my last newborn makes me want to snuggle him and give him whatever he wants, whenever he wants.  So much for the schedule I had Jordyn on!

Okay, this post isn't going anywhere I had intended, so let's get back to it...

Over the past six weeks, I've had the pleasure of taking dozens of walks with my kids.  We've went to the mall, the jump house, and out to lunch.  We've visited the park and taken picnics almost daily!  We went to Gram & Papa's house for a long weekend and the lakehouse for a week.  We've eaten our weight in ice cream, and played outside tons!  Most of all, we've just been doing what makes us happy.

Since we've made no trips to the vet {three times a week} and we've been outside almost daily {It was October-December last time}, that automatically makes it 100 times better!

Even though I have to return to work Monday {today}, I just feel so blessed to have spent the last 6 weeks with my babies.  Hugging and snuggling them.  Listening to Jordyn giggle and give the 'bebe' kisses over and over, and watching Baby Cullyn smile big and sleep so peacefully {during the day!}  I'm not ready to go back to work, but I don't know that any mama is really ever ready to leave her kiddos with anyone else.  I wish I could stay home with them forever, but to maintain our lifestyle, I must go back.  I'm fortunate to work part time {2-3 days a week} through Independence Day, and just four days a week after that.

Most of all, I'm just thankful for each day I get with my babies and I try not to take it for granted.

--I was just informed standard Maternity Leave in Canada is ONE YEAR!  We'll be moving there before we have any more babies!! :)

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